The Long Road to Recovery

The great r forthe to Recoery, From a Hopeless give tongue to of Mind and Body Michael A W summatee ENG 211 Professor Geoff pope March 14, 2010 The Long street to Recovery 2 The Long Road to Recovery, From a Hopeless State of Mind and Body Alcoholism and the affection of addiction develop been viewed in two strong yet entirely different blockades of the spectrum for as eagle-eyed as men and women keep back been losing simpleness of how much and when they drink. peerless end of the spectrum is the immoralist bear witness of view, which claims the lush as not having morals (Gary, 1999).When describing alcoholics, they have also been go to bedn to c entirely them sinful or moral weaklings (Gary, 1999). Throughout history, the alcoholic has been ridiculed, as described by Gary Stofle in the article The Morality of Alcoholism Society has ascribed to these views as evidenced by the fact that alcoholics have been jailed except for being alcoholics in the past. At worst, alco holics have been killed or left to die beca drop of societys views and from a lack of knowledge concerning intercession of potomania as well. At best, alcoholics have been laughed at, scorned, pitied and/or run out of town (1999).These views of the alcoholic have caused a great many to relapse, and even die, when every(prenominal)(a) that was needed was a little intelligence of the disease. The biggest problem with holding this view of addiction is that it can be potentially fatal for the alcoholic of The Long Road to Recovery 3 my caliber. The other end of the spectrum that I hold to be truer, yet still outweart agree completely with, is the view of the Amoralist. The alcoholic must also understand that he is not responsible for the amours he said or did when he was drinking.The physical addiction controlled his behavior, and because he is powerless over the addiction, he cannot be held responsible for it (Gary, 1999). My intent in this essay is give my first-hand experience of the offend and despair that the disease of drinking can cause, and how if you are imparting to do whatever it takes to end the pain and the suffering, any maven can be adoptd from the same hopeless state of brain and body as I was. My name is Mike and I am an alcoholic. I am responsible for the things that I have hold oute while being loaded.What makes me an alcoholic is that when I drink, I dont know how much I will drink, or what I will end up doing while I am loaded what I mean by that is when I aim alcohol or any other drug, I release my addiction all over again, and I am at the mercy of it. I bear my power of choice, between doing the right things and the wrong things. When I am loaded, there are only three places that I can end up jails, institutions, and death. The Long Road to Recovery 4 There are three main stages regarding the disease of addictioncolon the early stage, the middle stage, and the end stage.C. H. Angel writes, During the early stage of alcoholism an individual becomes more dependent upon alcohol. If a per word of honor has a stressful mean solar day, alcohol will be consumed to alter his or her mood. Alcohol is used to relieve stress on a regular basis (2007). I remember this stage clearly, this is when I was just trying to fit in and be one of the cool kids when I still had the power to control whether or not I got drunk. (Keep in mind that when you cross from stage to stage, there is an imaginary business concern that you cross.You dont know when you are about to approach it, or even when you have crossed it, but it comes and then it goes. ) The middle stage is the point where a person desires alcohol more intensely. A person starts drinking more alcohol at one sitting. The person clearly starts losing control over his or her drinking (Angel, 2007). When I got to this point in my demeanor, my thoughts and follow throughs were controlled by alcohol and drugs just about all my actions were consumed with the thoughts of u sing. What I mean by that is everything I did I always had thoughts of when and where was I going to get my next fix.The Long Road to Recovery 5 Angel describes the end stage as the individual is haunt with drinking. The individual drinks to the exclusion of all other people and all other aspects of his or her life. The individuals problems with alcohol are apparent to everyone near that person. The mental, emotional and physical wellness of the individual erodes rapidly in the end stage. Serious problems are present all around physical health, mental health, financial, inter-personal relationships, financial and legal (2007). When I hit this stage, my life, and my familys life got turned upside down.I couldnt hold down a job, nor did I want to, I had been to jail countless times, my family wanted postcode to do with me, and my children, didnt even know who I really was. I myself didnt even know who I really was. But for the thanksgiving of a loving god, and a magic place of Alco holics Anonymous, I was fitted to gain control over my addiction, and I was relieved from a hopeless state of mind and body. What my life was like I am not exactly sure as to why I became an alcoholic, and I might not ever know why I was afflicted with a disease that there is no known cure.But the fact remains I am, and I will always be one, and I am ok with it. I had a mother who The Long Road to Recovery 6 loved me dearly, and a step tiro who, as long as I could remember, always made me fight for his approval, attention, and even his love. I am not saying that he didnt love me or anything of the sorts. But I always felt like I was in a competition with my sister (who is biologically his) to get a piece of him all to myself. I grew up never meeting my biological father, and still to this day I have never met him, and now it is too late, because he has been dead for a couple of years now.My mother isnt an alcoholic, but my biological father did lose his battle with his disease of addiction in 2004, so the only thing that I could safely assume is that I got the gene from him, but since he is gone I will never know for sure. For the most I had a good childhood, nothing to traumatic ever really happened to me, I lived a sheltered, uneventful life. I lived in my childhood home with my parents up till the day that I graduated from high school in 1997. I was always surrounded by people who loved, and cared for me. So I dont completely understand where I went wrong.When I hit my bottom, I had been battling my addiction for many years. I had been in jail over and over again. For those suffering from the disease of alcoholism it seems to be an almost universal truth that before things can get The Long Road to Recovery 7 better, they have to get worse sometimes a lot worse (Buddy, 2009). That was completely true for me every incident by itself was never enough to stop doing what I was doing. Buddy writes, Alcoholism is a progressive disease there comes a point at whi ch even the most dedicated drunk decides that there just might be a problem.Alcoholism does not stay in one place. It doesnt hit a certain stage and then level off. It keeps deepening, affecting him physically, mentally, morally and spiritually. On all of those levels he keeps getting worse until finally he hits bottom (2009). Then after years of abuse, to me and my family, it all came to a head. On October 2, 2002, my house got raided for the manufacturing of methamphetaminescomma and that was the end of life as I knew it. As a result of the house getting raided, my kids got interpreted away from me, and placed with my parents, because I had failed them miserably as a father. misrepresent lives of blameless children is what my sponsor used to tell me and, boy, was he right about that. My daughter was a year old and my son was two months old when they were taken away from me, because I was a danger to them. It is only by the grace of a loving god that nothing had happened to them t hat I couldnt refurbish. The Long Road to Recovery 8 As a result of mine and my ex-wifes addiction, my son is autistic. He is high functioning, yet he is still autistic, so the wretched decisions that I had made, will affect him for his whole life.I spent 110 days in county jail, till I was released from jail on February 26, 2003. Even after I was released from jail, I still continued to drink and use drugs, until I quit trying to mask the pain that I felt, and tried to do something about the pain I had caused. So on March 20, 2003, I quit trying to control my life, cause my best decisions got me into the situation that I was in, from that day to this one, I have not taken a drug or a drink to hide any longer. What life is like nowWhen I quit trying to control my life, and let someone else take control, my life got better, I am not saying that it got better overnight, but it got better. On June 6, 2003, I was checked into impatient treatment at a place called American Behavioral H ealth Systems, in Spokane Washington. That is when I started to get control of my demons that I had been struggling with for such a long time. That is where I had learned about myself, and my disease of addiction. I spent 3 months there working on the things that brought my life crashing down around me. The Long Road to Recovery 9While I was in treatment, I took responsibility for my actions, and the damaged that I caused. I quit trying to blame my circumstance on the people around me, and I came to the realization that all of the things that went on in my life, had one common denominator, and that was me. Once I found out what made me tick, what I wanted out of life, and how drugs and alcohol played a detrimental role in ever attaining any of those things. I learned what I needed to do to get all of the things that I wanted out of life and most importantly how I could do it without drugs and alcohol.Too much personal testimony for this research-related paper. While in treatment, I started to repair some of the damages that I had put my children and my family through. In most cases, it took time to heal the wounds. As for my children, I had supervised visits with them, while they still lived with my parents. Once I had completed impatient treatment, and moved to Yakima, I had visits with them once a week till, on February 2004, after 18 months of living with my parents, they came to live with me again. The only reason that they were able to do that was because I was no longer a anger to them. The day they came back to me was the greatest day ever. I have to admit, that I was really panicky about the whole deal, because I wasnt sure how to be a father, a sober The Long Road to Recovery 10 father. Then I came to the realization, that when I was loaded I wasnt a father anyways. Today, I repair the damage that I have caused by not creating anymore pain. I am the best father that I can be to my children today, and as long as I dont get loaded today, they will neve r have seen me or remember seeing me loaded.As for going to jail, I havent been back since the last time that I got out in 2003. I took me to get clean, to realize that the only time that I had ever gone to jail was because of drugs and alcohol. So for today, I am a single father of three beautiful children, who love me with all of their hearts, no matter what I have done in the past. They know what I have done, because I dont lie or hide who I was from them. They know that I have made mistakes, and they have forgiven me, and they love and accept me for who I am, and not who I was.If you think that you might know someone, who is suffering from the disease of addiction, as outlined in the DSM-lV (Burge & Schneider, 1999) The Long Road to Recovery 11 1. Recurrent alcohol use resulting in a failure to fulfill major role obligations at work, school or home (e. g. , repeated absences or poor work capital punishment related to alcohol use alcohol-related absences, suspensions or expulsio ns from school neglect of children household) 2. Recurrent alcohol use in situations in which it is physically hazardous 3. (e. g. driving an cable car or operating a machine when impaired by alcohol use) 4. Recurrent alcohol-related legal problems (e. g. , arrests for alcohol-related disorderly conduct) 5. Continued alcohol use despite having unrelenting or recurrent social or interpersonal problems caused or exacerbated by the effects of the alcohol (e. g. , arguments with spouse about consequences of intoxication, physical fights) If you see any of these signs, dont be afraid that you are going to hurt their feelings, because it is not about sparing their feelings, it about saving their life.The Long Road to Recovery 12 The most important thing before an alcoholic can be approached is that they show signs of a readiness to modify. If the signs are not there, any attempts to make them change will fail. The readiness to change doesnt just happen, it takes time, and the time that I talk about is presented in steps. Precontemplation (not ready for change), contemplation (ambivalence about change), preparation (planning for change), action (the act of change) and maintenance (maintaining the new behavior) (Burge, Schneider, 1999).Not everybody stays off of drugs and alcohol on their first try. Relapse is common in the recovery process. This usually occurs when the alcoholic doesnt feel as if he or she had a problem. But if they are truly an alcoholic, they will eventually realize that they are, and they will ask for help. There are many places that a person can get help to solve the problems of addictions. You can go to impatient treatment, outpatient treatment, or just go straight to the entourage of alcoholics anonymous. Here is a list of some places where you can go in Washington for help Good 1.American Behavioral Health Systems, residential treatment serve are The Long Road to Recovery 13 located in the Spokane Valley at 12715 E. Mission Avenue, Spokane Valley, Washington, 99216, www. abhsinc. net 2. Schick Shadel Hospital 12101 Ambaum Blvd. S. W. Seattle, Washington 98146, Tel 1-866-938-6280 3. Sundown M. Ranch, 2280 State Route 821 Yakima, WA 98901-8302 (509) 457-0990, www. sundown. org My recovery from the disease of addiction was long and painful for me, but there is no comparison, nor would it be fair to compare the pain that I went through to the pain that the people in my life felt.The wreckage that I caused has taken a long time to repair, and I will continue on this roadway as long as I repair the damage that I have caused and dont slip back into active addiction. If it wasnt for the grace of a loving god, and the magical place of Alcoholics Anonymous, I would be able to be a father to my three wonderful children, be a son to my mother, or be a productive member of todays society. The Long Road to Recovery14 References Gary, S. (1999). The morality of alcoholism. Retrieved Feb 28, 2010, from mentalhelp. et Angel C. H. (2 007) period Alcoholism stages-understanding the progression of the disease of alcoholism. Retrieved Feb. 28, 2010, from ezinearticles. com/? Alcoholism Progression-of-the-Disease-of-Alcoholism Buddy T. (2009)period Hitting bottom, usually it must get worse before it gets better. Retrieved, Feb. 28, 2010 from About. com Burge, S. K. , and Schneider, F. D. , (1999) Alcohol related problems Recognition and intervention. Retrieved Feb. 28, 2010, from www. aafp. org B- 86/100 = 129/150